You’re 30+ rocking leggings?

(friends don’t let fat friends wear leggings… ever)

Like any female fashion trend goes here in DC, you know once you see it you’re going to have to put up with it for the next three years. That’s cool; I’ve learned to get used to it. I mean for four years we had to deal with the fabulous winter trend of girls wearing jean miniskirts, grey leggings and uggs. This fashion trend was bearable because it was followed by early 20 something girls (under 25). This target demographic tend to be poor, mostly followers, who read magazines like Allure and Elle. Lately though the leggings have become the winter fashion center of most girls in DC’s wordrobe. They now come in different colors and materials Nylon, cotton, faux denim and even Latex.

Again if you’re interested in talking to a younger woman in this city there are some things you should be ready to put up with. Leggings along with references to The City are among them. You go to certain hipster spots or clubs you can find this look. Personally I think it’s played out like the jerry curl, but I have that whole, “if everyone else is doing it…” mentality. To me it’s kind of stank, for some reason I get this mental image of a girl laying around all day in her grey cotton leggings, not showering or anything, then that night she gets a phone call from one of her girls and she decides to throw on a Jersey dress, a keffiyeh and a jacket and head out the door in the same leggings she was hangout in. Even worse is when I see fat chicks in leggings, for some reason I get the mental image of a vagina that smells like bacon. Then when she walks by me I get this look on my face where my nostrils flare up as if someone farted in a crowd.

(sniff sniff, bacon)

Anyways, like most stupid trends there’s only one official for sure way to determine it’s reached the breaking point and is now officially over. That is when old people/ grownups try to pull it off. Tell me why I was at my usual trendy lounge and I saw some woman who couldn’t have been a day younger than 34, wearing leggings, a flannel shirt and a belt. There was something a little sad about it and at the same time something that made me want to Chris Brown her in the face. Maybe it was the way she carried herself that night as if she was some kind of fashionista or something. Even though it was something Jenny Humphrey would wear to go take a dump in. I sighed in disgust, I hate when a woman doesn’t know how to dress like a woman but instead shops at forever 21 and wears clothes my baby sister would piss on. I never thought I’d be looking forward to summer which will bring muffin tops, jean miniskirts and flip flops.

I still love my DC girls

Possibly related: